“At the root of all the harm we cause is ignorance.” Pema Chodron
I don’t want to move. I just don’t. The desire has momentarily left me. I’ve been striving, moving, running, searching, working, churning, burning but for what? I’m tired of the chase. I’m tired of the hyper-tension and in the face of all that is- the facts, the stats, the reality-I’m going to be honest, the moment feels a little bleak. The other frozen shoe has dropped; parts of the Western Antarctic Ice Sheet are collapsing. We have officially moved too fast in the direction of our demise. We don’t have time to change our minds or our ways in order to curb global warming. Still we drill, and still we spill and still we fill our very full cups. And all the powers that be seem concerned about is making sure the internet is no longer free. We are the maddest creation that my little brain can fathom or that my little eyes have seen.
Desire isn’t bad. Desire gets our motors running and heads us out on the highway. Desire moves us in a direction because its power is undeniable. We want, but the object of our affection is rarely the thing we are after. We think we want material possession but it’s never that simple. We think we want the love of the Unavailable One. We want status, safety and respect but underneath all of that we just want to know that we are OK. However instead of focusing on healing our self-worth issues we focus on attaining something outside of ourselves. Our culture exalts acquiring Mr. or Ms. Right and/or external possessions as a way to fill a “god-sized hole”with false idols that will not last. In the process we’ve rapidly stripped the earth of its wealth and its capacity to heal itself. In the face of these bleak statistics and cold, hard numbers the corporate monster machines keep chanting, “Sell, sell, sell, buy, buy, buy!” plundering our fragile eco-system systemically supported by our elected (bought) officials and “democratic”process.
Desire always stems from a source that is deeper than it appears. Every spiritual practice worth its salt allows at least a moment of reprieve from self-centered desires and helps one remember the soul’s spiritual pursuit: to realize itself so that there is no longer a need to grasp for anything. It’s all right here. We need nothing but this moment. All the love, all the connection all the answers are here. That is harder to remember than it is to forget.
In my rejection and distain of The Yoga Industrial Complex I realize that I have thrown out a couple of keys that drew me into the whole mishugas in the first place. It’s easy for me to deconstruct the western yoga scene. It caters to straight able-bodied, white, wealthy, cis-gendered, thin, English-speaking folks. It’s become mostly about money and fame. It’s cult of celebrity: self-promotion instead of self-actualization. It glorifies itself as THE answer mostly without being self-reflective or self-critical. In many ways it’s become the worst case scenario of what happens when capitalism and spirituality make such an awkward union. I have a deep love for the art form which is why I feel I can be critical of it. I believe that there should be yoga classes and yoga studio’s everywhere. But that’s only one piece of the pie. There are far too few yoga communities that reflect and encourage diversity. However, what I lost in the midst of my rejection of the industry at large is the powerful benefits of the practice itself: stillness, mindfulness, awareness and being present. These are the simple things that bring me sanity, joy and peace.
As I look around at the environmental devastation and the undeniable and very inconvenient truth of the matter I only want to slow down more. There doesn’t seem to be many answers as to what we can really do given this new information. I do know how I want to be come heat waves and high waters if this is in fact our fate. Wednesday’s full moon in Scorpio reminded me of the transformational magic of a sturdy and reliable effort towards self-knowledge. This week, as Mars, the planet of action, slows down to a halt I feel this lesson ever deeper. If it’s all going to get weirder from here I want to be as grounded and connected to myself as I possibly can.
In the wee hours of Monday, May 19th the moon enters the all-knowing, brilliant Aquarius; the sign that blazes trails of rebellion, reform and vision of a future with all of us in it. Aquarius sees without being swayed by sentimentality or taking things personally (poison in any partnership). Later that night Mars stations direct in Libra. Mars has been in the sign of relationship activation and initiation for the better part of eight months. Its retrograde was powerful and fueled the Grand Cross that took place in April. This has been assisting us in understanding our role in relationships, our boundaries and yes, our desires. The shift of this planets direction marks yet another big moment astrologically speaking. “Big moments”help us to connect with our true nature, the unchanging nature of our being. We do not die and we were never born. We are energy and energy is eternal.
The moon and Mars make a perfect trine to each other at the moment that Mars appears to come to a standstill and change direction. This signifies a time of powerful information gathering about why we do what we do, what is worth doing and how we want to go about doing it. The moon reflects our bodies, the physical manifestation of our soul’s purpose and Mars reflects our drive, our ability to pursue, defend and protect what we desire. A trine signifies harmony and flow between these two factors. A moment of experience outweighs a lifetime of study; a moment of self-realization can heal some of the deepest wounds. This is a moment of integration, an initiation that brings the disparate parts of our mind back from their far off flights of fancy, worry, regret and obsession. This is a moment that can reveal the truth inside of the story.
The waning moon in Aquarius, after being graced with a passionate moment from a trine with Mars then goes onto trine Mercury in Gemini, a pure archetype of The Messenger if there ever was one. A little over 24hrs after Mars stations direct, the sun enters Gemini and Mercury enters the shadow phase of its next retrograde cycle. All of this occurs between Monday, May 19th and Thursday, May 21st (or early Friday morning depending on where you live). This is a lot of movement in air signs, a lot of change and flux. When planets change direction, change signs or enter the shadow of their retrograde cycle (especially Mercury because it moves so fast) we know something is afoot. When all three happen in air signs with the support of the Aquarian moon we can be sure that there is a breeze picking up carrying to us kernels of conscious awareness, kernels that can easily blow past us or find a home to settle into. This is a call to awaken from ignorance.
As always the astrology is ours to use. We cannot control all of the factors of life but we have some power over how we see, understand, interpret and digest the experiences we are faced with. I suggest slowing down so that the moments of the day aren’t lost on you, so that the lesson and the information that they carry aren’t just another thing you rush through, so that you do enjoy what is right here to enjoy. I encourage slowing down so that you might come into right relationship with your desires, so that you might understand what is beneath them and if in fact you want to serve them, consciously.
Blessings,
Chani
Edited by Laurence Joseph Jones
